So I have been made redundant. Only been here for three years and all the work has been shipped out to India. So it is time for change. A big change. I have decided to take a trip from Bristol to Ibiza for some summer sun - at the moment I live in Clifton, but what will happen when I finally end my job who knows, only that for a few weeks I am going to get over to the sunny island to relax and take in some excellent music.

So I am auditioning. I am your Simon Cowell. If you are attractive, female, daring, hilarious, and hold a good conversation then I want to say "you are through to the next round". The next round involves some dinners and drinks in Bristol to assess your suitability for the semi final, which involves coming to Ibiza at my cost and chilling for about two/three weeks.

So step up on the stage and let's see if you get through to the next round...

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